one million lovely letters

That moment when you are so down like you have never been in your life yet. And you walk into a bookshop on your way home. After loosing hope to find a book that will fit your current mood you find something that not only will fit your mood, reflect what you are going through but it also will seem like the author is your long lost twin sister that somehow was born and raised in England. Jodi Ann Bickley may not going through the exact same things in her life, her struggles in life are much harder and serious. But emotions people feel in their chest are the same. The book found me (that is what I prefer to think) at the perfect timing, because if I read it couple of years ago I would't relate to it as much as I did. Her uplifting true story called 'One million lovely letters' which is also the name of her online project. This project is about writing to people who need a letter to remind that they are not alone in what they are going through in life, say how special they are and just make a little bit difference in their mood at a very important period in their life. Jodi wants to reach one million mark. The project is still in process. It saved her life, changed for better and she believes it makes changes in others' lives too. I didn't write to her, or received a letter from her. But her book was enough to make me feel better and put a smile on my face. Cover photo on the inside reflects some letters she have sent to people. I picked this one for myself:

Here are the parts of the book I found myself in:

'But I think memories and mementos are important. I still have a note passed by a guy in my college class. It had a cartoon drawing of me and underneath it said 'My name is Jodi and I have pretty eyes'. Anyone else would wonder why I had kept that, but it mattered to me and things that matter are kept.'

'Love was based on looks across a classroom and notes passed and conversations on MSN until midnight on a school night. Everything meant something, and it was all so exciting and new.'

'I've always been a very open person, who assumes people will be kind, so when they aren't - when people say hurtful, bullying things - it leaves me vulnerable.'

'She said that's what love is - the end of the world as you know it and the beginning of something a little bit more wonderful.'

'It's hard, as an adult, to ask for anything. To be dependent on other people. I guess we all wish  we were tough little cactus plants: needing the occasional bit of water but on the whole completely independent, able to protect ourselves when we need be.'

'Fake it till you make it, bab!'

'I didn't want to talk to someone, I didn't want advice - I just wanted to tell someone I was falling apart and not feel guilty about it.'

'When you've had a low opinion of yourself for a long time any rejection from another person is nothing in comparison to your own rejection of yourself.'

'...I felt too guilty that I wasn't happier.'

'Sometimes you need someone to say what you already know.... to stop beating up yourself up for not feeling better.'

'Friends would ask what I've done at the weekend and I had nothing to say. I hadn't done anything. I felt useless.'

'..., and if I could laugh at myself the world hadn't crumbled just yet.'

'We don't listen to ourselves enough so we need other people to remind us how amazing we are.'

'I haven't always placed my heart in the hands of someone who knows how to look after it - or even wants it - and all it leads to is a very bruised little heart.'

'The bed feels massive. It's not even that big but tonight it feels like I could fit galaxies in it - like the galaxies between us.'

'So I didn't cry, I just stayed sad. Every other minute I remind myself it is a physical impossibility for my heart to fall out, even when it feels like it will. You are stuck with that pain in your chest and your tummy and it will be OK. Apparently, hope so, one day, maybe, we'll see.'